Thoughts on Vocation

One very great difference between my “growing old” ways and the new ways of our present day youth, is my continual puzzlement at their obsession with "discernment”. In my day (I can’t believe I just said that) young men just mulled it over privately and then suddenly sprang it on their parents, friends and even perhaps their unsuspecting girlfriend that they were called to the priesthood. No one, except the parish priest perhaps, knew any of the details to their discernment which was probably short and sweet and practical. They saw some parish priests they admired in action, so to speak, and decided that this was what they also wanted to do for God. Girls were the same. They watched a nun they admired at school, noting her joy and peace and satisfaction with a life lived for God, and this image grew in their imagination over time and they slowly grew in their conviction that God might want this for them as well. Their news was also quite a surprise to everyone for the most part. If you asked them, it was always one or two particular nuns or priests whose example led them to take their own plunge.

Now there are discernment retreats, discernment prayer groups, discernment here, there and everywhere. I find it odd how long and how vocal these discernments are without any concrete decisions being made one way or the other. I wonder if it is because we have switched to evangelizing en masse, that is, in a general way on the internet with the promise that “millions are being reached” - but are they, are they really? Are they concretely? There are many “charismatic priests” online, priests who have written books, who hold seminars, who are on podcasts and the lecture circuit. But one might posit that these priests are missing the point with their ceaseless preoccupation with being seen by millions: the real point might simply be that one on one example needed by perhaps just one particular young man; a young man actually seeing them, personally, in action as just that: parish priests. Priests who are faithfully in the confessional and often, priests saying quiet, beautiful Masses day in and day out. Priests who bring the Eucharist to the homebound and those in hospitals. Priests who go home early from parties they are invited to in order to pray their Divine Office or to bring the solace of Extreme Unction to the dying. Pastors who make sure that the truth is being taught in their grade schools. Young men are watching. They will see this and they will take note. I have never heard any young priest of worth tell me that he felt called by reading stuff on the internet. No, he always felt called by watching a particular priest in action. Something to think about.

Vocation in the Gospel is always solid, swift, and demands courage. Jesus called and whoever was in the “hot seat” so to speak, had better be ready. Nowadays, I think many young men like the whole idea and mysterious feeling they have in declaring they are in discernment without any concrete steps being taken to take the final plunge. It is a sort of virtual reality - like being in a video game where the online, larger than life Catholic priests and nuns are. They can feel involved without having to do anything but watch. They can be avid podcast listeners and online groupies without calling attention to themselves. They can attend endless discernment retreats and tell themselves they are doing something without actually committing to the concrete YES, here I am Lord! They don’t necessarily seek a personal response face to face - that might be too scary. And indeed it is! Perhaps they have not thought to bravely approach their pastor, one on one, asking pertinent questions before his very eyes after Mass one morning and then facing his own hard questions in return. Questions that might demand a commitment.

Also, the only two vocations explored and spoken of far too often are the married state and the priestly or religious state. Nothing in between. Maybe some young people are lost in the discernment loop because they don’t feel an affinity to the priestly, religious or the married state. They might think those are the only vocations out there and so they might be discouraged or puzzled - not feeling called to any of them.

I was thinking about this last night while I was loading the dishwasher (being called to the married state, as it were). Within the lay state there are many choices that can be called vocations! One does not necessarily have to be married or be a religious to choose them. But they are callings, to be sure. They are fruitful, evangelizing tools.

I thought of all the people who have blessed me in my life. Since I am a homeschooler from way back, I had to create my own "village" so to speak. Those other adults who came into my children's lives to enrich and bless them where I could not. I received much grace from these lovely people. They truly were portals to, and examples of God’s kindness and care. I made a list here of 'vocations' that would really be wonderful channels of grace for a Catholic young person to pursue.

Librarian:

You can influence what children read. You can lead them to the beautiful and good books you loved as a child. You can help moms learn more about different authors that appeal to a child's innocence. You might have some clout as to what gets purchased for the library and give some valuable input. If you were homeschooled, you can make homeschool children who visit the library feel less like anomalies and talk to them in an easy way about your own experiences as a student growing up.

Our librarian James got my high school son through a lonely patch. My son, being a budding slide guitarist, had started researching odd and interesting blues bands and music. James would make suggestions and always had a great conversation with him when he brought his finds to be checked out. James never condescended but listened with true interest and even went home with some of my son's suggestions. He was a real peach, James was!

Anesthesiologist:

You are the last person a patient sees and talks to when facing surgery. My father had this profession and he made rounds the night before surgeries to talk and joke with his patients. I know another doctor friend who had this profession and offered to pray with her patients before they were put to sleep. Not a one said no. This profession brings comfort to fear and uncertainty. What a great gift to be able to give.

Hair Dresser:

This person hears all sorts of things, and sees all sorts of people. First, he/she makes you feel like a new man or woman. A great haircut can sometimes make a bad day great. We all know it. Plus, a hairdresser can talk about a million things with her clients. Her house, her cats, her children. And she can be a willing ear to someone whom no one ever has time to listen to - especially the elderly. If she's bold, she can talk about her Church and how much she loves it. I have always loved my hair dressers. They were the ones who never blinked an eye that I had seven children and that we homeschooled. They were always intrigued in a good way.

O.B. Nurses:

Pro-life platform! Rejoicing and cheering on the first time mom as well as the mom of maybe seven with equal love and excitement. Sometimes women who are having their fifth child are afraid of raised eyebrows and unspoken "too many's" when they come in with a painful labor. What balm to hear someone say "WOW five kids. You are so blessed indeed. What name did you choose? Here dad, you know the drill. Cut the cord". It would be a lovely vocation to encourage the blessings of being pregnant at all and being open to the beauty of children, no matter how many or how few.

Highschool Theater Directors:

Oh, the possibilities! Your chance to lift up and bless a bunch of nervous, insecure, awkward, hesitant teens. Give them quality plays to perform and give them the chance to shine. You will be amazed how much good you do in a teen's life and help them to form a proper self esteem.

Catholic Therapists:

Someone who is well trained in long standing therapeutic procedures, but one who also knows that suffering is viewed very differently by a Catholic than it is by someone who does not believe. It would be a beautiful vocation to help someone understand whatever they need to come to understand. But to let them know that you believe what they believe and they can also put their suffering in context while they work it out psychologically with you.

So many other vocations. School Bus Drivers, teachers, Composers, Sacred Artists, singers, dancers, sympathetic Oncologists with lovely senses of humor, and hospice nurses who help a frightened patient die, and die well and in peace. There are so many wonderful channels for grace to enter the world. These can all be called legitimate vocations.

I think we need to suggest many possibilities when we talk about discerning a 'vocation'. We need to bring up these vocations for young people to think about in addition to the priestly, married, or religious life. We need to remember that the single state is also a powerful state. It is free to do so many things a priest or nun or married person might not have the time or qualifications to do. Seeing these vocations in action might be the call a young man or woman is listening for from Jesus; one that will spur them on to leave everything and follow Him.

Just some thoughts while loading the dishwasher in my married state.